Now you see it , Now you don’t


Insult to inundation

Now you see it…

One day last week before the umpteenth snow storm of the season was forecast to hit the following morning, I readied Old Orangesides, my trusty gas-powered two stage electric start snow blower and went to bed confident that I could meet whatever challenge Mother Nature was bringing our way. Just like the highway department crews that load up their trucks in advance of the oncoming storm, my machine was filled with gas and parked on the covered patio, ready to go, in the very same pose as it was proudly pictured in Issue 14 of Opinion8ed. Brookhaven National Laboratory had already given notice that we’d be under a delayed opening till noon to give the site crews time to adequately clear the roads and sidewalks so I slept in until 8 and then went downstairs ready to have my coffee and fire up the snow hurling machine to clear our driveway and walkways.

...Now you don't

But when I glanced out the side door window to gauge how many inches we got this time, a surreal sinking feeling came over me. What would ordinarily have been an idyllic peaceful scene gazing out over the freshly deposited snow, was somehow marred; something wasn’t quite right. As I stood and pondered the “what is wrong with this picture” moment it took a few seconds but suddenly hit me… my snow blower was no longer parked in its usual perch. No footprints or tracks in the snow – gone without a trace. Vanished. I imagine it’s the same feeling you’d get returning to wherever you parked your car only to realize it was no longer there… I swear that’s where I parked…

The reality that it had been stolen was the next piece of information that was not processing easily. Disbelief. Could this really have happened on my street, at my house? Then outrage…damn! And finally the realization that I’d be getting out the shovel and clearing the snow by hand. Shit! Later, intellectual rationalization… perhaps it was someone out of work trying to feed his family by clearing snow. Lastly, turning lemons to lemonade: I realized I now have an excuse to shop for the latest in snow clearing technology, i.e., a hybrid powered, turbocharged 12 horsepower engine, infinitely variable transmission, limited slip posi-traction differential, halogen headlights, hand warmers, cup holders, navigation system, satellite radio…

Published in: on February 6, 2011 at 11:12 am  Comments (2)  

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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. like the new format… dislike that the snow blower went for a walk…like the description of the new and improve snow blower…like taking the hills with friends!!!


  2. Rude, Paul!!! I do hope your new machine is orange also – awesome color!


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